Being Grateful For (My/) The Eating Disorder?!

Background story

In elementary school at around age 12, I had problems with classmates and I never really fit in. I was simply different than the majority.

I love video games (and Manga & Anime in the past) and have a foible for Japanese culture since I was a kid.

Therefore, I often hid my interests because I was too afraid of being judged.

I tried to fit in & haven’t listened to my intuition (I didn’t know what this even is at that time).

The first time I felt fat was around age 14…And my grades dropped – my self-confidence was non-existent.

Even though I changed schools in grade 9 I carried traumas from the past with me and the wounds were deeper.

I thought being skinny would solve my problems…

 To make the long story short

After hitting rock bottom at age 18 I have learned so much about how our body works.

Without my eating disorder:

  • I hadn’t chosen the path of self-love

  • Wouldn’t have discovered spirituality & the Law of Attraction

  • Wouldn’t be where I am now and the person with all the experience, I gained over the years

  • And so much more…

If you haven’t, listen to the full topic on my newest episode and don’t forget to leave a 5* review!

LISTEN TO THE GOODIE HERE:
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My Monthly Update - August

I like reading stories about the people behind a blog and get to know them better. So that’s why I thought I could do the same, where I’ll write an extra post every month.
Just sharing a lil summary at the end of each month. Today I share with you how my August was.

The first two weeks...

I started august with coming home to my mom as this summer semester break started. It’s always a 5 hours trip from Bremen to my hometown via train.
She picked me up from the train station - as mostly every time & I was glad to see her. We made a trip to Erfurt and had some quality time – just mom and me.

There was also a reunion with my best friends, who I know since I’m a smol bean.
I also made a trip to a friend from Dresden on my own. The last time I saw her was one year ago. So, it was time. Unfortunately, [she also struggles with her mental health][1] and has an eating disorder.
It was cool, we talked a lot and she showed me her city. But what I realized afterward, I automatically adjusted my eating habits to hers. Which resulted in eating less as I’m already on my way back on track to heal from the past months.

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Healing & Recovering

I don’t have these typical ED thoughts, but I would lie if it would be easy to just eat more again. Alone the fact my hunger signals are a bit confused. I estimate my intake roughly to make sure I’m eating enough. Been there and now I can do this again.
You just can’t trust your body after a period of restriction, even if it was a few weeks or months this time. As long, as your body isn’t at its happy point, your hormones and overall health aren’t in balance. Your body itself is confused. Give it some time, lots of love, food, rest and patience and it’ll work out. Have trust and faith!
The time with her was a lesson to learn from and to focus on myself, other’s eating schedules have NOTHING to do with mine and I shouldn’t care at all! Same applies to you!

Week three and four...

Last week I finally handed in the homework I had to do with a group of my classmates. My friend (one of whom I worked with) and I were so relieved as this process was stressful. Gladly we don’t have to do such tasks once again.
She also visited me one week ago and stayed here for 3 days. We went together to my hometown’s annual festival called “Mühlhäuser Stadtkirmes”. People from all over Germany visit my little town just for this fest, which is funny.
Normally, I’m not into drinking, but during this time I make some excuses here and then. I don’t like parties, but it’s cool to meet people again who I only see once a year. There are always massive amounts of topics to talk about. And I love talking a blue streak, haha.

Unexpected family stuff...

Then, a few days ago something happened. My sister, 2 years younger than me, who is pregnant and unemployed, is now living in my mom’s apartment. After she broke up with her boyfriend. Who has the same qualifications as her... She also never took responsibility for her own life and lives of social welfare.
This is a very difficult situation for me as my mom isn’t understanding my problems, as my sister triggered parts of my eating disorder. She was the one, who preferred when I was little, and now I feel the same again.

My sister is hard to talk to. I often got the feeling she’s not having a clue what I’m talking about. And normally you can expect to have a good conversation with someone who is 21 years old.
I don’t want to complain, but my mom supports her fully. She now also doesn’t have to take responsibility at all, nor thinking about how she wants to make a living for her and her newborn.

I’m not going to put myself into danger and risk a relapse just because of her and since I sat together with my mom and her without a good result. My mom isn’t realizing what’s going on as she’s blinded by her feelings. My sister will always be her child and I see clearly.

I’ll decide something which is not easy, but crucial. I will try to get her into a mother-child facility, where she will get help from professionals. Maybe I risk driving a wedge between my mom and me.
Deep down I know this is the right step.
Not only for my future niece but to create her future in terms of education and earn money or even finding her purpose. To be on her own and which is most important to me, to take the heat off my mom.

How to deal with difficult family situations

1. Stand up for yourself and talk about what’s bothering you. If you keep things by yourself which are related to other people, you’ll only hurt yourself in the long run.

2. Create a little haven only for you. It could be a room where you just spend time with yourself. Remember, you’re the most important person in your life and therefore self-care is a huge part. Do things which make you feel better and automatically raise your vibration (more about spirituality & the law of attraction here). I love spending time in nature, doing yoga, reading, playing video games, among others.

3. Accept and seek help – if necessary. There are tons of professionals out there who love to help you, and in some cases, you can even remain anonymous – such as in helplines.

4. Love yourself. It’s like in a toxic romantic relationship. Give yourself the love and things, you believe you need of someone else. You are already complete.

I know (depending on your situation), you want to have any problem solved. But the thing is, you can’t save the world nor should you take full responsibility for other people’s problems.

Check out my “Let’s become independent” worksheet I’ve made for you!

 

 

Sometimes saving yourself means letting go – even family members. Especially if they’re either unhealthy for you. Then, just as some friends, who you don’t get along together anymore – they’re not meant for you and you’ll attract more people in your vibrational state.

 

 

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How To Cure Perfectionism

Don’t worry about not doing “it” perfectly right now. It’s ok, just keep at it, you will soon settle in it and then you’ll be glad you didn’t give up.”

TemitOpe Ibrahim

Perfection is an illusion. Yet perfectionists demand it from others while being far from flawless themselves. The margin of error of the human condition is often our greatest area of excellence and discovery.”

Stewart Stafford

One of the biggest challenges I have trouble with – and maybe you too? – is perfectionism.

You want to figure it all out, don’t want to mess up and your greatest nightmare might be: FAILURE.

But exactly this mindset can hold you back in life. Whether it’s finishing or achieving something.

Sometimes even from getting started. Your expectations (and maybe even others) of you are rising.

At the same time, you feel scared and stuck in a negative spiral where it’s getting harder and harder moving forward.

I was trapped in this problem (and still recovering from it) for many years, particularly as a side effect of anorexia and now in university as well as while working on this blog.

It doesn’t have to be this way.

Being a perfectionist could hold you back, from goals, dreams, etc.

Today I’d like to share 4 simple, yet powerful tips to untangle form it and which can help you change your destructive thought patterns into more easy-going ones.

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Allow yourself to fail

Yes, you read right. It sounds counterproductive at first.

Allowing yourself to fail is an important step to success and a better whole being. Failure causes pain, shame, and other negative feelings.

But it’s a crucial part of the process and also means growth, both mentally and physically. You can only learn from mistakes.

The next time you have more knowledge and can solve problems much easier. Those can show you new paths and directions as well. Which you couldn’t have seen in the first place.

Don’t compare

We all know how unhealthy and pointless comparing ourselves to others is, yet we often tend to do it anyway. Growing up in a society, where competition and unrealistic standards are kinda normal it’s easy to feel not “good enough” or “wanting to be like…”.

Comparing yourself leads only to focus on your fears, worth and often self-doubt. We mostly just see the “highlights” of anyone else’s life which are just a fractional part. Comparisons like these are unfair.

Your fellows get affected too

People around you are affected too. If your expectations of yourself (and if you’re working with others as well) are too high or unrealistic it could lead to end certain jobs, relationships, plans, etc.

You most likely don’t feel good in an environment of people who are constantly double-checking or stressing about anything. As this will harm yourself and anyone else in these surroundings too.

By reminding myself of what could happen, not only to me but others as well it becomes easier to switch my negative thoughts into more positive ones and focusing on steps or tasks which are helpful.

Take care of yourself

Stress and anxiety which might be symptoms of perfectionism are one of the main causes of many health issues.

These not only can block your creativity but also could be dangerous for your (mental) health.

Remind yourself why you started something. I’m sure you don’t want to end up burned out before you reached a goal (at all). Part your goals in smaller portions and take them step-by-step & this way you’ll accomplish a task faster and more productive!

Set aside a time every day which you only use for yourself. You can work out, go in nature, meditate, play video games, etc. Do whatever the heck you want and recharge!

You see perfectionism will harm you and your environment more than it’ll help (if it’s helpful at all).

Breathe & take a step back! You got this & you’re not alone in this!

"The Achievement Trap" is a good read regarding this topic!

 

 

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My Experiences With Therapists In Germany

Hello friends! I'm very busy with my studies and in a few weeks, I'll have my finals for this semester. I struggle with "work-life balance" and set myself under too much pressure, therefore, my creativity suffers. But I work on that and I try to be more active on my blog again. I hope you understand. Recently I've been wanting to make my blog more personal next to sharing tips and giving advice.

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Today's topic

Today I want to talk about an important and personal topic, therapy. When I got diagnosed with anorexia accompanied by depression and anxiety (which is very common) I was shocked because I haven’t thought it was that serious. Anorexia tricks a lot with your mind and you often don’t realize how difficult and complex this illness is. I said to doctors “no way, I’m not that sick, I can overcome this easily on my own.”.After I got down to dangerously low weight and sleeping with 3 blankets, thinking about food 24/7 I broke down and cried my soul out to my mom. At this time I also decided to quit my apprenticeship because I couldn’t concentrate or work at all (I also didn’t like what I did). We decided to go to the doctors the next day and he send me to a psychiatrist. I had to get an appointment and couldn’t go there immediately, I had to wait about 2-3 weeks. As I got there, my blood got checked, of course, I got weighed, my mom and I had an interview separated to check the situation at home. The psychiatrist I talked to wanted to send me to a clinic for eating disorders, but I didn’t want to go. I was 18 at that time and so they couldn’t force me. She was very harsh and I didn’t get well with her. (But now I realize she must be like that because my illness was that serious.)

My first therapist

I took the responsibility to get outpatient therapy and was looking for a therapist in my hometown.Luckily, I found someone who just opened their doctor’s office and I got regular appointments after only one month of waiting. Usually, you wait 3-6 months because the wait lists are so long. Anyway, I got skeptical from the beginning on because I was uncomfortable talking to a male. Especially about such personal and deep topics. But I gave it a shot because I couldn’t recover on my own when I was caught in the depths of anorexia, where I could have died “easily”. This was around January or February of 2014. At this time, I took some time off for about 10 months as I mentioned before in order to focus on my recovery. I started going to therapy once a week and did nothing special besides that. But one thing was that I caught up with my interest in Japanese culture and started learning Japanese on my own. I could do a part-time job next to that, but my anxiety was on the rooftop and I was way too anxious to even talk to someone in a supermarket, drugstore or similar. So I was “only” going to therapy and besides that staying at home, where I practiced, more or less what I’ve learned in my therapy sessions and through the recovery community online. The last one was more helpful in my opinion because I worked with the wrong therapist. He set me under too much pressure and confused me. Especially when I slowly started eating again...

Troubles, Problems

One time he said what I eat is okay, and one time he even said it’s too much, even though I tried my best to hit recovery amounts and stayed sedentary in order to repair my body and heal my soul. Eventually, I relapsed several times during this stage and was in “quasi-recovery”. I often had arguments with him and it just was not beneficial for my healing process. Sadly I continued to go to this therapist until my apprenticeship started because I still wasn’t able to find a new one and I thought “better a bad therapist than no one”. Within these 10 months I eventually got to a minimum healthy weight, but the boundaries to underweight we’re little.

Life without therapy

After I utilized all my therapy sessions I couldn’t go to a new therapist for 2 years (yeah, this was a stupid law in Germany which could be dangerous for patients with illnesses such as eating disorders, where risks of relapse are real at all stages) and was kinda forced to apply what I’ve learned in the past. And this was surprisingly better than I thought since it’s not good to make the success of your recovery dependent from professionals. No matter if you get the support of the best doctors or therapists if you’re not ready to go out of your comfort zone and face your fears you will stay poor. And eventually, risk your life. Living with an eating disorder (or any other mental illness) is like playing Russian roulette. Luckily, I was strong enough to finish my apprenticeship and went to an ED clinic for 3 weeks after I graduated. This was in spring 2017.I went to this clinic to stabilize my current health state and there were so many people caught in the depths of their eating disorders and other issues which reminded me of how far I came. Because I thought I barely made progress in those past 3 years. The best thing, by far, was meeting my roommate which I’m still friends with till today. She’s such a sweet soul and I’m grateful to have met her. We spend a lot of time laughing and reminding ourselves we're not our illnesses. I’m proud of her progress so far (Girl, if you read this, big virtual hugs!). In this clinic, I had different forms of therapy by several professionals, including meal preparation, body awareness exercises and of course also group therapy where we discussed personal topics and could give our opinions & tips.

My first adventure on my own

A few months after I got outpatient, I moved to Cologne to attend university (where I didn’t enjoy my major but met someone I’m still friends with today and I this city will always have a place in my heart) & found a good new therapist there. She was literally one of the best professionals I worked together with. She gave me good advice and we worked through stuff which was under the condition of my eating disorder. Btw, I hate saying my eating disorder, like if it was my pet or something, lol, but yeah, it doesn’t define me, so I NEVER say or want to hear I’m eating disordered (that makes me angry.).

Back to the present

Half a year later I was back in my hometown and got appointments with a new therapist who accompanied me until I moved to my new place where I study now. I want to prove myself I don’t need professional help anymore and here I want to apply everything I’ve learned the past years. This works well so far.The most important thing while finding a therapist is, be honest with them and yourself. If you don’t feel like you can trust them, then search for them as soon as you find the “right one”. Kind of the same thing as finding the right partner, you just know when it’s the right one. Have you ever been in therapy?

 

 

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What Are Subliminals & How To Use Them

Howdy, my Friends! Today's topic is, as you can read in the heading, subliminals. These are a very popular and useful weapon in the [Law of Attraction][0] community, but even those of you who aren’t on this path can enjoy their benefits as well.It comes down, like almost every time to your belief system.

If you read this word for the first time, you might ask yourself “what the heck are subliminals?

The term “ subliminal ” (usually means “ under ” or “ below ”), indicates to brain waves that are produced when you listen to the oh-so-called “binaural” beats, which are in pure sounds or music. It is basically a designed message or signal as inaudible to the subconscious mind. It should pass below (“ sub ”) the normal limits of perception. You can use them for whatever area in your life you want to improve or change. It could be financial freedom, success (at work, your business, university/college or school), health, appearance (yes, you can even change your eye color, hair structure, etc. – there are tons of success stories out there) or whatever you can imagine.

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Now move on to today’s topic…

But here is a guide on how you can use and make them work for you:* Write down areas or things (preferably one at a time) you want to improve or change-Search for subliminals based on your “ problem ” on YouTube or just google it – there are tons of them online made by lovely people. You should be able to find them easily and fast.

  • Pick a time where you want to hear your subliminal every day, it’s better to listen to it regularly at the same time (in my opinion, you’re free to do whatever suits you!).-I highly recommend using earphones. As it is easier for your brain to incorporate those binaural waves or beats.
  • [additional] Listen to a subliminal booster before listen to your actual subliminal-Make sure to drink a lot of water as the information goes to your subconscious mind and could dehydrate you. Staying hydrated is so important and will make the manifestation process better.
  • Focus on one subliminal and listen to it multiple times a day, preferably as often as you can. I hear my current subliminal after I studied and/or before I go to bed. Some people say it’s crucial to listen to it throughout the night as you put it on a loop, but I don’t do it this way and it shouldn’t be less effective. So don’t worry.
  • Focus on this one subliminal and don’t change it for a time. Your desires won’t come to you after a few days or a week. It takes time and patience. And you need to believe it. The more resistance and blocks you have, the more difficult the manifestation will be. Sometimes I’m very skeptical and acting as if it is already in my life helps. This might be a helpful tip for you as well.
  • After you listened to your subliminal you should let go. Don’t think about it too much as this creates a state of lack and pushes your wish further away from you instead of coming true.

Do things which make you feel good as this will help to keep your vibrations high. The higher your vibrations are and the better you feel, the easier it will be for the universe to work with and for you. I hope I’ve got everything together and easier for you to understand this interesting topic. Especially if you heard of this for the first time. It really sounds like real-life magic , doesn't it? Do you use subliminals?

 

 

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How To Support Friends, Family Members Or Others With A Mental Illness

Friendships are so important for getting through the hard time's life sometimes throws at us.If you need someone to laugh, talk or cry for a little time, friends are a good support system.If you have a friend or know someone with a mental illness, here are tips to make their life a bit easier. 

  • Listen

Make sure to give them a feeling of not being too much, too exhausting, [insert adjective…] and be there for them. It doesn’t matter how often this person will talk about this. Whether it is a few or multiple times. It takes a lot of courage and trust to open about these problems. You should feel good if someone is trusting you at such a high level. You’re not an expert or a professional, but you can always have an open shoulder and help for just being there for this person. I feel good if someone just asks me how I’m doing. 

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  • Go Out With Them

And with that, I don’t necessarily mean go to a party. Of course, you can if you both want that.It’s good to be outside. Just breathing fresh air is really good. This distracts your mind a bit as you live more in the moment. I often feel like that when I take a walk. This won’t cure depression, for example, but it can help to temporarily lift their mood and make them more awake. They probably don’t want to go if you ask them, but persistence helps. Some places, such as school or work should not be avoided and help to not identifying too much with their diagnoses. Because you’re encouraging someone who doesn’t want to do anything to something with occasionally high returns. It really helped me to be eventually forced into going when I initially refused. Find good places where it's peaceful, scenery or calming to walk, like a park, a garden or (if you live nearby) the beach. You can also do a picknick (if the weather is good). Or go out for a cup of coffee or a drink and walk back. 
  • Meals

Having a healthy relationship with food is important for everyone. And if someone struggles with a mental illness, their eating habits could be messed up. You either eat nothing or only small amounts out of lethargy or you refuse to (e.g. having a restrictive eating disorder) or you find yourself binging on chocolate in the afternoon. Hot and balanced meals? What’s that? No way… What you can do is:- Order a takeaway, and eat it in a cozy environment- Bake some treats, and there are tons of nutritious options out there- Go grocery shopping and cook together with them. Eating something homemade is such a different feeling than eating something ready.- Invite them for a meal. Make them feel at home and just have a good time together 
  • Do some household tasks

Especially when it comes to depression, where normal things, let alone the chores are very exhausting. And supporting a friend with, for example, doing the dishes or clean the house/apartment takes a load off them. Moreover, a clean and tidy place to live can help to boost someone’s mood too. You can also take an avoided phone call on their behalf for them. This could be a hairdresser or doctors’ appointment or taking out their trash, something small what disturbs them. I remember when I was too anxious to take phone calls. There are so many ways, where you can make someone’s day brighter by just doing little things. Help them with grocery shopping, write a shopping list with nutritious but also soul foods. This way, your beloved ones can maintain a healthy relationship with food. You should only eat what you (and your soul aka hunger cues) want and messing up your appetite will only confuse your body and led to more problems. Some people try to compensate for problems with alcohol, drugs or other unhealthy behaviors, but this won’t solve the problem at all. They might feel good for a while, but their sorrows will come back even stronger if they suppress instead of dealing with them. And the thing is, they and you’re not alone. Even if your friend doesn’t find a therapist at first. There will always be at least one person they can trust. This person is you in this case and talks to. If you know each other for a long time then you can understand your friend/colleague/family member even more, than a therapist who only knows them for a few weeks or months. (But this isn’t a substitute for a therapist in general!)Regular exercise is important as well. You don’t need to go to the gym with your friend and lift weight multiple times a week but taking a walk in the morning or yoga in the evening can boost their (and your) mood tremendously. And healthy isn’t only food and movement, it’s also about getting enough sleep. We often crave a refreshing night’s sleep, but some nights are just exhausting because you can’t seem to shut your eyes, and just sleep. It could be helpful to make it a rule to turn off your mobile phone one hour before you go to bed because leaving it on wouldn’t make it easier to put it aside and just go straight to sleep. Some people are more likely to hang on their phones for HOURS. So, in conclusion. It’s important to have rules, to have a routine where you have set meal times, and to do daily tasks. You can always support your friend/colleague/family member and there are lots of opportunities to improve their lives. Thank you for reading this. Did I miss an important tip?

 

 

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How To Stop Caring What Others Think About You

At some time, we're at the point where we care or better said, care too much what other people might think of us. And we feel guilty for that, as this prevents us from being who we truly are or from doing what we want, from chasing our goals and dreams. From the way we speak, which outfit we wear to what we order at a restaurant. We just think too much about others' opinions of us. Our thoughts may be like these "Will they judge me, or think I look stupid/[insert adjective]" and we may be do something different than we originally wanted to do based on what we assume others think. Are you familiar with that? I've done it, and still do sometimes, and I think you too.We might dress and style a certain way because it's how we guess others expect us to look. Or we eat a specific way and work out because that's what society is telling us, and we think we have to do that "because that's what everyone is doing". But how much of our lives are influenced and affected by caring too much what other people think (or what we assume they think)? The solution to this problem is simple, but in no way easy: "Actively live your life and don't give a f* what other people think"

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I started practicing and still do that by following these strategies.

  • Remind yourself of the truth.

And the truth is, no one really cares! Most people are way too busy with their own lives, and we often just interpret too much into glances cast at us or misunderstand things or words. If some people say mean things to you or comment on your outfit etc in a negative way means that person is in all likelihood insecure about themselves and tries to make them feel better by putting others down.But this has NOTHING to do with you, and if you let that get too close to you, you only hinder yourself. Try to remind yourself of these two points, when you catch yourself again slipping into the thoughts carousel. When you're faithful to yourself and don't allow the assumed thoughts of others dictate your choices or even your whole, opportunities expand, and your joy increases dramatically.
  • Reclaim your freedom.

Know your worth! My love, you have so much to offer, you can do whatever the hell you want. Especially we, who live in the western world. If something stands in our ways, it's mostly ourselves.Limiting beliefs discourage us to do so many things. One of those limiting beliefs has a lot to do with what we assume other people might think of us. Shaking these off can change our whole lives. You can always start small, and changes won't happen overnight. Especially not, if you act certain ways for years. Maybe you struggle with the way you dress, you don't trust yourself enough to wear a certain outfit, despite liking it. But you know what? Wear THAT outfit. You don't dress up for anyone but yourself. And if you like these clothes, then every question has been answered.Another common example is, ordering something in the restaurant. How often were you in the situation where you let the orders of others dictate what you order? You wanted a Pizza, and everyone is ordered a salad. You would feel bad about yourself and adjust your choice. The problem is, you wouldn't feel satisfied, because you didn't do what your soul (or in this case, your gut) wanted. Next time, order exactly what you want without letting it influence by other people. Listening to your body and soul is so much more important!
  • Put yourself out there

Sometimes we don't do what we really want because we are too afraid, again with what other people might think about us. Maybe write down things you want to do, but actually, don't go after them because of what I just mentioned.So many chances are thrown away by having this mindset.For example, you're too insecure to flirt with interesting people. But there could be the chance this person likes you the way you are (and only these are worth it) and meet people who could be inspiring or having a good time with. Maybe even meet the love of your life. The next time, ask someone for a date, who you are interested in. Sounds a bit harsh, but sometimes you need to give yourself a little kick in the butt. We only live once.So, friends, go outside, show the world how awesome you are! You have crazy dreams or want to choose a different career path than most people in your surroundings? Go after them. Educate yourself, look at what you can do right now to make your first steps toward your goals. Dreams and goals exist to make them come true. And those have nothing to do with other people. They are your own and part of your life. Only your life. Imagine reaching your goals. Wouldn't it be awesome? Start today, and who knows where you'll be in 6 months or a year.Don't be afraid to do what your soul, your inner being is telling you.Do what you're passionate about.It's the right thing, I promise.
  • Enjoy time alone.

This is very important to me and it's crucial to become independent. The more you get in this direction, the less you're concerned what other people might think of you. Because this will increase your self-worth. Meaning, you know you can have fun alone and you know you are amazing. A few weeks ago, I went to a concert completely on my own. I first thought "oh people might think I have no friends" but I have shaken this off quickly. There were many people and I enjoyed the music and just seeing one of my favorite bands. I was so grateful for that.If you do things like these sometimes, you care less about other's opinions. 
  • Surround yourself with positive people.

This is another important one, especially if you suffer from low self-esteem and you can't see the positive aspects of yourself. And if you hang out with people you have fun with, who you can talk to and it's easier for you to just be yourself, you'll automatically feel better. Those people won't judge you and accept yourself as the person you are. You can even ask them what they like about you and make you feel better.The next time you get a compliment, accept it thankfully. And not reject it.The more often you'll do this, the faster you'll believe those positive things people tell you. In conclusion, there is no sense of caring too much what others think because you can't please anyone. The only person you should please is yourself! You live your life for YOU, no one else. Use your time wisely and invest this worthy time in yourself. Spend time with people who know your worth. Do things, which fulfill you. We don't like or understand everything everyone else is doing - so why do we expect that for ourselves? People have different goals, different views, different personalities, and different motives - and that's completely okay!

 

 

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